Fear, Let’s face it, we all experience it in some form or the other. Some of the fears are actually helpful for us, for example the fear of loneliness especially among the elderly which should push one to be more social.
Fear of heights and loud noises are the two that we are born with as we come out of the birth canal.
All the rest are learnt models and ways for our nervous system to keep us safe.
Which takes us to,
Fear melting Step 1
Establish a safe Space.
Our nervous system is constantly scanning the environment and evaluating if it is safe for us to be in.
You obviously don’t think of this because otherwise you would be running yourself mad in no time, hence this is an automatic and unconscious act.
In today’s world, 99% of the Fear Feelings are made up by our own mind and have no real physical backing to them, especially in the present moment! Long gone are the days of the Savanna when you had the very real and Immediate danger to life.
As we start to move our mind further away from fear, it becomes easier to establish and look for ways to increase safety in physical, emotional and mental sense.
Like I said earlier, from the perspective of our nervous system, the element of safety is ALWAYS its number One desire!
TRUST is well needed too.
For us to start melting away fear, we absolutely need to have a solid link of trust towards ourselves as well as the possible people & elements involved in the scenario.
Let’s say you are afraid of flying, nobody in their right mind who has a fear of this mode of transportation, will have any shape of trust to those metal tubes or that they would stay up in the sky.
Same thing goes for people, from the nervous systems perspective; the people who cannot be trusted are a low form of danger and fear to us.
So, as a solid start, make sure the environmental space is safe and you have established a connection of trust inward and outwards towards the people involved in the scenario.
Step 2 – Take Massive action towards the Fear!
Doubt, insecurity and uncertainty loves inaction. Stagnation is the perfect breeding ground for these feelings to grow and multiply.
Taking deliberate and big actions TOWARDS the fear, not away from it, will start to melt the feeling quicker than possibly anything else that I know of.
If you are afraid of public speaking for example as many people fear this more than their own death bed, put yourself in bigger stages and situations where you must speak up.
I did exactly that here!
By the sheer act of putting yourself out and exposed to the very feeling will start to loosen the tight grip of fear that may surround you at the moment.
It can be as simple and fast as this two-step process!
Remember though, nobody said that it will be easy, it will definitely require you to push those boundaries and get yourself into your own rugged edges.
I guarantee you that the rewards will be worth it!
Safe, trustworthy and action-packed fear melting days; 😉
Tuomo
PS.
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